Slightly Unhinged
by PekkasandBJ
Summary: What happens when you send a crazy, godlike, psychotic, 4th wall breaking Faunas to Beacon and make him have a relationship with another Faunas there? This. Prepare for insanity, things that make no sense, 4th wall breaking and sexy times! WARNING: Sexual Content, Language, Violence, Gore and Racism (Toward Faunas) Ridiculously OP OC.
1. Chapter 1: Meeting The Madman

**Mad Man's POV...**

"Well you can go fuck yourself!" Dante yelled at the voices in his head.

...

"My mom is your mom! That's disgusting!" Dante replied to them.

...

"Oh, so you go from wanting to fuck our mother, to wanting to go to Beacon! I mean, I have the power of a God and could destroy this entire dimension with a flick of my wrist but come on! It's school!" Dante moaned.

...

"B-but the homework and the teachers..." Dante weakly muttered.

...

"Alright. Fine. There better be some cute girls there." Dante growled before he placed a finger on his chin. "This is an anime, of course there will be cute girls." Dante summoned potato ice-cream covered in mushrooms and cheese in his hand and began eating, a blissful expression appearing on his face after he took the first spoonful. He chuckled before he shoved everything, glass and all, down his throat, the sound of breaking glass as he walked.

 **At Beacon...**

Dante ended singing the YMCA backwards in his head in German and French at the same time, don't ask me how, I haven't a clue. He marched through the gates as the head-teacher began.

Dante blocked out the head-teacher's speech and just stared blankly at a tree. He glared at it after a second. That damned thing was taunting him. With it's green leaves and brown branches and superior height, it just smiled smugly at him. He named this tree Timmy. Dante wanted to break Timmy.

 **Later...**

Dante was at the cliff. He had to go retrieve some useless thing from a ruin. He was staring at the head-teacher.

"Can I help-?" He began.

"OH CANADA!" Dante whooped. The head-teacher blinked.

"I don-" He tried again.

"WE WILL! WE WILL! ROCK YOU!" Dante whooped again. The head-teacher wondered if this student was sane. He just sighed and activated the springboards, screams of surprise everywhere. He looked up at the crazy student and blanched in shock. He was going through the air in a sitting motion with a teddy bear across from him, flying too, and they both had cups of tea in their hands.

Dante was flying while having a cup of tea with Ted-bear. Ted-bear told him scary stories of monsters under the bed and dirty stories about a woman who pleasured another woman to death with scissors and some Dust. Dante had no idea how she did it but he was intrigued. He noticed the ground getting closer.

"Our time draws to a close. I will return when you fly again my dear friend." Ted-bear stated before he vanished. An anime tear fell from Dante's eye as Ted-bear left in a puff of smoke. He clapped slightly before he straightened his legs. He landed on the ground and bent his legs slightly and the grass didn't even shift. He looked around the peaceful passage.

"Delta 2-2 this is Zulu 5-9, do you copy?" Dante whispered to himself, now suddenly in army uniform and wielding a toy shotgun.

"Delta 2-2? Report." He waited a second before he dropped to his knees and screamed loudly.

" **NEEEEEEEEEEEEWWW!"** He got back onto his feet and began walking toward the ruins, completely fine.

 **More time later...**

"-Cheese!" Dante finished. The Grimm Hounds and Ursa's gathered around him barked in laughter. He chuckled too and snapped his fingers, splattering the Grimm all over the floor, him and the trees. He growled. It was all Timmy's fault that he got covered in blood! Stupid Timmy! His ears twitched on top of his head.

OH YEAH! Dante forgot he was a Faunas, a Cat Faunas to be exact. Funny, right? RIGHT?

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA!" Dante laughed suddenly. He scooped up some blood in his hands and began licking it like a cat would with milk. Soon, his palm was empty. He felt the Grimm blood run through him and attempt to change him to a Grimm. He chuckled manically and ran toward the ruin at the speed of sound, slamming his body into a wall.

"My toes!" Dante yelped. He removed his red face from the wall and gripped his toes, hopping in one spot. He didn't actually feel anything, pain was a funny thing like that. He placed his foot back down after a while and looked around, seeing two girls, a small girl covered in red and the other a tall girl in yellow. He smiled and appeared in front of them.

"Hello!" He yelled. The girls took a step back in surprise. "Come on! We need to get some useless relic!" He grabbed them both by their hands and yanked them with him as he ran faster than the speed of sound, using his powers to make sure he doesn't rip their arms off.

Dante looked around the relics and scratched his chin, which should he take? He grabbed a random one and ran up to the two girls. He grabbed them again, walked up to the relics and gave them the ones that would make them on his team.

"YAY! We're on the same team!" He yelled. He grabbed both of their hands and teleported back to the cliff where they were launched off and he met Ted-bear. He pointed at the girl in red.

"I'ma call you Small Tits!" He declared, much to her massive shock. He pointed at the girl in yellow. "And I'ma call you Big Tits!" He suddenly appeared in between both of them. He placed his elbows on their shoulders.

"See ya later, Small Tits and Big Tits!" He waved slightly before he disappeared.

 **Ruby's POV...**

Ruby and Yang just stood there in shock at the crazy boy.

"What..." Ruby managed.

 **Mad Man's POV...**

Dante was petting himself in his room. He had set up the room he was in for a group of five, he knew that he would be getting four allies who he could drive nuts. Madness equals happiness, you know.

"I'm not masturbating! I'm scratching and rubbing my ears you dirty readers!" Dante yelled at the voices in his head. He made sure to make the room as comfy as possible. "Damn right!" Dante stopped petting himself and stood up, taking a dramatic pose.

"Introducing Dante! Well Decorated Decorator extraordinaire!" He declared to himself. He snickered and returned to petting himself.


	2. Chapter 2: Taking Care of a Racist

The door opened and four girls stepped inside. They stared in shock at the five beds already neat and set out somehow in the small room. Ruby and Yang gasped.

"Yang, didn't that crazy boy earlier give us a relic which would make us on his team?" Ruby asked.

"Yeah, he did." Yang blanched in horror.

"Crazy boy? On our team? It's bad enough we have you here Ruby, now we have a mentally unstable man here." Weiss growled. Blake raised an eyebrow.

"I smell a stuck up sexy bitch!" A male voice yelled from behind them. The group of four jumped back in shock and turned to face him. They saw a Faunas male with cat ears and a tail, wearing a black hoodie, completely zipped up with the hood down, blue jeans and black shoes. "Well hello there! My name is-"

"BIG TITS! SMALL TITS! NO WAY!" Dante jumped in glee. "YAY! You're on the same team as me!"

"You did give us the relics which would make that happen." Yang stated before she crossed her arms.

"Did I? Huh. Nevertheless, now we can murder Grimm and feast on their rotting carcasses!" Dante laughed maniaclly. Yang, Ruby, Weiss and Blake thought this guy was insane. Dante stopped laughing and looked at Blake seriously.

"So you're Blake huh?" He said. He looked her up and down with the eye of an eagle. "I suppose me and you could work as a boyfriend girlfriend relationship." Blake blinked in shock. Well, he was certainly blunt about his attractions.

"W-what?" Blake started. Yang burst into laughter.

"You don't know? The author made the main couple of this story me and you." Dante gained a faraway look in his eyes a second.

"Oh that looks like a sexy sex position." Dante muttered when he came of the faraway look. Blake blinked three times. Dante sniffed before his eyes widened.

"I SMELL BACON! GOTTA RUN! ENJOY THE BEDS AND ROOM I MADE!" Dante waved as he ran away at the speed of sound. Yang smiled.

"He's certainly blunt about his crush. Eh Blake?" She teased. Blake gave her a glare.

 **Mad Man's POV...**

 **"BACON!"** Dante yelled as he snatched the bacon from the lunch lady's hands. He began gnawing at it, like a murderous animal. He didn't care that he took the bacon from a really racist human.

"Faunas! Give me my bacon you animal!" Cardin yelled. Dante stopped eating.

"What did you call me? An animal?" Dante asked. Cardin nodded with a smile on his ugly face. Dante dropped the bacon and turned to face the human that needed to die.

 **PAINFULLY.**

Dante began laughing as he advanced to Cardin, a truly psychotic laugh. Cardin stood his ground as Dante stood in front of him. Dante leant his head back and laughed loud enough for everyone in the school to hear.

This wasn't a humored laugh.

This was a laugh of the truly insane.

The laugh of a psychotic mad man.

The laugh of a murderer.

"I'M AN ANIMAL!" Dante turned around and announced. "A DIRTY, FILFTHY ANIMAL! SOMEBODY PUT A LEASH ON ME AND ORDER ME AROUND!" Dante placed his hands in a choking motion on his throat as he announced this. Dante turned back to Cardin, a grin on his face as his hands fell back to his sides. "Am I truly, an animal. Not worthy of the same treatment as humans?" Dante tilted his head a full 90 degrees as he asked this.

"Of course you mad thing." Cardin stated firmly. Dante tapped his nose.

"Boop!" Dante stepped back. Cardin gave Dante a questioning gaze before unmeasurable pain soured through his body. Cardin fell to the floor, screaming in pain as Dante watched in sadistic glee.

"WHAT'S THAT! WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME!" Dante yelled. Cardin didn't reply, favouring screaming instead of a reply. Dante looked around the cafeteria at all the shocked students. One stood out, a girl with rabbit ears. He hit Cardin hard enough to knock him out and began a slow walk up to the girl.

 **Velvet's POV...**

Velvet was too shocked to do anything as the crazy boy walked up to her.

The day started off completely normal. Velvet woke up, checked if she had any unfinished homework even though she never did, and went to the cafeteria for breakfast. She got some vegetables from the non-racist lunch lady, carrots of course, and sat down peacefully. She hoped Cardin wouldn't start picking on her, even though he always did.

Then the insane boy came in and **everything changed...**

Velvet leant back uncomfortably as the crazy boy leant down over her. While she admitted that he was handsome, his insane grin and eyes ruined any trace of kindness.

"What's your name?" He asked. In the silence, he sounded so intimidating and loud. Velvet gulped.

"V-V-Velvet." She replied, barely.

"Well then Velvet, beautiful name by the way." Velvet blushed. "Has this boy ever bullied and teased you about being a Faunas?" The boy gripped her shoulder and leant his face closer to hers. "Don't lie to me."

"Y-Y-Yes." She squeaked, terrified by this boy. He appeared beside Cardin's unconscious body, grinning from ear to ear.

"THEN THAT JUSTIFES ME DOING THIS!" Dante suddenly screamed. It was so very loud that it hurt the ears of anyone in the cafeteria. Cardin woke up and began screaming. Dante grabbed him and threw him at the wall. Cardin impacted heavily and flakes on brick fell down from the wall and grains of cement fell down. Cardin fell off the wall and hit the ground, too much in pain to even blink. Dante began laughing again as he danced on the spot.

"YOUR PAIN IS SO DELICIOUS!" Dante laughed. Dante appeared beside Cardin again, this time with a machete as long as his arm. He grabbed Cardin by his hair and pulled him up to see him eye-to-eye.

"I'm not gonna kill you."

"I'm just gonna hurt you."

 **"Really really bad."**


	3. Chapter 3: Balls and a Date at 5

**Dante: "Hey, WRITER! GET OVER HERE!"**

 **Me: What do you want Dante?**

 **Dante: "You made a mistake on Chapter 1! Grimm don't bleed, they vanish!"**

 **Me: And? The blood makes you crazy.**

 **Dante: "I'm not crazy! I'm a scientist and can prove it!"**

 **Me: Then you're doublely crazy. Anyway, readers, since Dante has started occupying himself with my stash of porn, I'll go ahead and let you start reading.**

 **Glynda's POV...**

Glynda Goodwitch couldn't believe it.

The boy brought into her room was... broken, to say the least.

He was unconscious otherwise he would be screaming bloody murder.

His body was mangled in a way that all his bones, except ones he needed to live, were broken.

All his skin was removed and the muscle underneath was exposed to the outside world.

Glynda would have done something to help him, had the person who did this to him not burst through the door at that moment.

"GLYNDA, I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU!" Dante yelled in her face. Glynda, to her credit, only twitched once. Dante snapped his fingers and an egg appeared before him and Glynda. "HAVE FUN!" Then, Dante vanished.

Glynda rubbed her forehead. Why was this boy so... maddening?

Something brushed her leg.

Glynda looked down, expecting a rat or bug or something.

Not a thick black tentacle with the thickness of her arm.

Glynda looked at it in shock for a second. This was all the tentacle needed. Suddenly, more wrapped around her arms and legs and bent her over her desk and scattered the papers on it. Her backside was lifted into the air by her bent stance.

A tentacle the size of her arm dragged it's slimy surface over her panties, sending waves of unwanted pleasure through her.

 **The Mad Man's POV...**

Dante had his ear to the door, a grin on his face.

A girly scream was heard.

Dante moved his ear from the door, satisfied with his work.

"THANK YOU JAPAN FOR YOUR WONDEROUS TENTACLE PORN!" Dante yelled at no-one. Then, he vanished.

Dante appeared in front of Velvet, who jumped in surprise so much that she raised her leg...

...and hit him in the nuts.

Dante hunched over and let out a exhale of pain before falling to the floor while holding his nuts. Velvet stared at the man in suprise.

"Owww. What happened?" Danny's usually high-pitched voice was now much deeper and manly, making Velvet wonder if she hurt his balls. Dante began trying to get up, wobbling dangerously. After about a minute, Dante was able to stand on his feet.

"V-Velvet?" Dante asked in his deeper voice. Velvet blinked and began trying to apologise. Dante held up a hand. "Vel, calm down! I'm actually thankful you did that, since my sane side came out when you did. So thanks." Velvet just looked on before nodding in a daze.

"As a thanks, I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime?" Dante scratched the back of his head, actually embarrassed and sheepish. Velvet blushed heavily.

"S-s-s-sure." Velvet nodeed. Danny's mouth moved. Velvet was worried that his crazy side would come out with a mad grin, but he only made a kind and charming smile. Now she saw, and Dante wasn't being crazy, he was actually really easy on the eyes.

"Right. Meet you in the town at 5. Don't worry about trying to find me, I'll find you easy enough." Dante smiled another charming smile before he bent over and laid a peck on Velvet's cheek. The Rabbit Faunas blushed much harder and noticed that The Cat Faunas in front of her was also blushing slightly. Dante vanished without another word. Velvet placed a hand on her cheek and couldn't help the swooned smile that came to her mouth.

Dante appeared in the room of his team, startling Ruby, Wiess, Blake and Yang.

"Hey." Dante greeted as he snapped his fingers and a bed appeared. Dante dived on the bed and was out like a light.

"Wait, did he just greet us normally?" Yang asked.

"Yeah I did." Dante mumbled in his sleep. Ruby, Wiess, Blake and Yang just looked at each other.

 **In the mourning...**

Ruby, Wiess, Blake and Yang woke up before Dante. They all looked at the boy in the bed.

At their first greeting, they thought Dante was a crazy, psychotic, powerful weirdo. Now, after he'd greeted them normally and not done anything maddening, they began believing that he was just crazy, psychotic and powerful.

Yang was the only to take the liberty of waking Dante. She shook him a couple times before he grabbed her and, with surprising strength, pulled her into his bed and clung to her like she was a massive teddy bear. Yang was in shock as Ruby fought to keep her laughter under control. She failed. Miserably.

Ruby's laughter woke Dante who blinked before he looked at Yang. He scrunched his face up.

"Please tell me we used a condom." He demanded. Yang raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't sleep in your bed last night. You just yanked me in." She growled. Dante shrugged before he smirked.

"Don't you mean I YANGed you in?" He remarked. The room fell silent.

"That was really bad." Ruby deadpanned. Dante shrugged, still holding onto Yang.

"Oh, like you could do any better." Dante rolled his eyes. Then, he threw Yang off his bed onto her own and got up. He snapped his fingers and his clothes changed to that of the school uniform. He git up and began stretching to work out some kinks in his body. Dante signed in bliss as a snap was heard. The snap sounded like Dante had just snapped his entire spine into little pieces.

"Well, you four. Let's go to class and listen to teachers drone on and on while they pretend to know what they're talking about." Dante quipped before he vanished.

All of Team RWBY let out a sigh. Dante was so random, even in his sane mode. The sane mode, however ,was much more attractive. Team RWBY sighed as they all got dressed and began walking to class.


	4. Chapter 4: Lesson

RWBYD was in Professor Port's class. He was in another of his rants.

Ruby was drawing a picture of the Professor Poop as she called him.

Weiss was paying attention and getting angry at Ruby.

Blake was secretly reading a book.

Yang was watching and trying to hold in her laughter as she watched Ruby.

Dante had died from boredom. Literally, in his chair, sat a skeleton.

"-and eventually I killed all the Ursa Majors! Speaking of perfect, who in here believes that they would make a perfect Hunter or Huntress." Professor Port asked. Dante, happy at the chance to finally actually do something, regrew all his skin over his skeleton and, using his power to hold Weiss' hand down, raised his own. "Ah! You be love that you will make a perfect Hunter? Let's test that theory. Everybody to Combat Classes, we're going to use their fields." Professor Port ordered. All the students began moving, while Dante just teleported.

Shoving pancakes down his throat by the shovelful, literally he used a shovel to eat the giant pancakes, Dante watched as everybody entered the room.

"PANCAKES!" Came a girly voice as a woman began running toward them. Dante appeared before her and lifted her by the throat.

"What, exactly, where you just going to do?" Dante asked darkly, making everyone in the room nearly piss themselves. Somehow, Dante could be twice as scary as Glynda.

"N-nothing." The girl shook her head. The air in the room lifted, the pancakes and the shovel vanished and Dante began smiling.

"Okay! Let's get going then!" Dante let the girl go and faced the professor, who blinked before he nodded.

Everybody except Dante went into the bleachers to watch the fight between Dante and the Grimm while Professor Port was walking over to the bleachers with a rope attached to a cage, it's contents hidden from sight.

Dante himself wandered over to the middle of the arena.

"Now, we see how well you can adapt to different situations!" Professor Port proclaimed. Professor Port pulled the rope down. Dante smirked as the cage fell to the floor and opened up to reveal a Boarbastusk.

Deciding against using his powers to kill the Boar very dead, Dante summoned a completely black sword with strange yellow glyphs on the blade. He planted the sharp end of the sword in the ground and placed his chin on the hilt on top of his hand.

The Boarbartusk charged at Dante. From the side, RWBY yelled for Dante to do something. Dante turned and smirked at them.

The Boarbartusk slammed it's head against a invisible wall. A glyph, identical to the second one on Dante's blade, appeared in mid-air and glowed a bright yellow. The Boarbartusk attempted ramming the glyph again but this time, instead of just hitting it, it bounced off and slammed against the wall.

Dante grinned as RWBY gasped in surprise. He looked at Professor Port to see him surprised as well.

Dante turned back to the Boarbartusk as it rose. This times it rolled into a ball and charged at Dante. Dante raised an eyebrow and split into two as the Boarbartusk rolled through where Dante previously was. RWBY once again gasped in surprise.

The two Dante's looked at each other, high-fived, and charged at the dazed Boarbartusk.

The duo began slashing at the Boarbartusk with the skill of legendary Huntsman. **A/N: I'm too lazy to write the fighting scene so just imagine the two Dante's hitting the Boarbartusk in perfect unison whenever you see the words GOOD!**

GOOD!

GOOD!

GOOD!

GOOD!

The two Dante proceeded to kick the dying Boarbartusk into the middle of the arena. The duo melded back into Dante. Dante then ran around the Boarbartusk, once, twice, thrice, four times before he stopped and the Boarbartusk was thrown to the other side of the arena, slamming against the wall.

Dante appeared beside the Boarbartusk and sliced it in two, the first glyph on the sword glowing.

Professor Port stared in shock, like the rest of the students, before he composed himself and clapped. The clapping was slow at first before students began joining in and it turned into a roar of clapping.

Dante simply appeared into the the middle of the arena and bowed before he straightened and slashed the letters RWBYD into the air in yellow glowing energy with the fifth glyph on his blade glowing.

The clapping intensified and, somewhere in the crowd, Ruby began bouncing up and down, Weiss clapped and admired his skill and professionalism, Blake clapped and, when Dante looked directly at her and grinned, she looked away with a red face, Yang clapped and stared at Dante with a fire in her eyes.

"That was a perfect example of what a Hunter should be! Adaptable and able to keep your opponents guessing! A brilliant example Dante!" Professor Port praised. Dante stayed in the middle.

"Professor, we have enough time for a spar, correct?" Dante asked. Professor Port checked his scroll.

"Indeed we do. Would you like to select your opponent?" Professor Port requested. Dante grinned and looked over the audience. Ruby was bouncing in her seat, waving her hands at him, Weiss was subtly ordering him to select her, Blake was giving him a almost unnoticeable desperate look and Yang was openly giving him a desperate look. Dante's eyes scanned the entire crowd, with one person in mind to punish. Dante pointed.

"Jaune."

The entire crowd looked at the blonde-haired boy, who seemed to have become several shades paler.


	5. Chapter 5: Lesson In Liars

Jaune seemed reluctant to head down to fight Dante.

Dante growled at Jaune.

"Get the fuck down here!" Dante snapped, out of nowhere. Just like Randy Orton's RKO.

 **Somewhere, Randy Orton sneezed as his name and catchphrase were used.**

Jaune went down to fight from the encouragement of his team and the rest of the audience.

After all, Jaune got into Beacon through skill, right?

Jaune walked over to his spot opposite Dante, who was giving him a look that made him terrified for his life.

"Ready?" Professor Port asked. Dante nodded quickly while Jaune hesitated before he also nodded.

"FIGHT!"

 **BOOM**

Jaune felt like a hundred trucks had just hit him. He was firmly planted into the ground from Dante's powerful hit.

Dante pulled Jaune up from the ground to show the extent of his injuries. He held him up by his throat.

Blood was pooling below him as it dripped down from his head, body, arms and legs. Somehow, he didn't pass out from blood loss.

"You sicken me Jaune." Dante growled. "There are true hero's, people who deserve to be here." Dante pulled Jaune close to his face but kept his voice loud enough for everyone to hear.

"Then there are pieces of shit like you. People who lie, cheat and fake their way into the hero business, ruining people who could actually a difference's chances." Dante gave a dark smirk at Jaune.

"I know what your family did for you Jaune. They faked your transcripts, made you seem worthy of the Arc name. After all, their family is full of powerful Hunter, who would doubt it?" Dante grinned fully as he noticed Jaune's team, who were trying to enter the arena but were stopped by a barrier he put up, stare at them in disbelief and denial.

"Your father didn't want you to become a Hunter, you know that Jaune? If he did, he would have trained you. But he didn't. He hated his father because his father forced your father to become a Hunter to carry on the legendary Arc name. Your father wanted to break that chain and took every chance he could to dissuade you discreetly, but you were too stubborn to notice it. So he faked your transcripts to let you in. Hoped that you would get kicked out and change your dream, but you didn't." Dante's speech removed the little hope that Jaune had of becoming a Hunter.

"Don't cry on me Jaune. My hoodie is a collector's item and I will snap your neck if a single tear touches it." Dante warned. Jaune held in the tears that were threatening to flow.

Dante held Jaune up for them all to see.

"This is what a fake Hunter is! This is what the Arc family has done to their only son! This is what will lead Humanity to extinction!" Dante brought Jaune's face to his own.

"But I don't want that. As horrible as your species is, they are much better to watch than to sit in solitary for another millenium or two." Dante snapped his fingers and all of Jaune's wounds healed. Dante let go of Jaune, who could fully support himself but felt to his butt, staring at Dante.

"So I'm giving you a chance, Jaune. I've just given you the necessary training and knowledge to potentially become a real Hunter, one worthy of the Arc name." Dante began walking away from Jaune but stopped.

"Oh, and take Pyrrah on a date already. If you two aren't boyfriend and girlfriend in the next week, I'm going to make the both of you have sex with each other for hours on end." Dante turned and grinned at Jaune before he walked back to his team, walking past a madly blushing Pyrrah, hyperactive Nora who was talking about setting Jaune and Pyrrah up, and Ren who was actually in agreement with Nora for once, and sit next to them, ignoring all the looks from the audience.

"Well, that certainly was a speech and a half. Well done Dante! Mister Arc, I would like to meet you after class to talk about those, 'fake transcripts'." Professor Port stated. Everyone left the classroom, giving Dante space as they walked away from him.

The only people near Dante, who was still in a thinking pose, was team RWBYD, without the D (wiggles eyebrows), and team JNPR, without the J (I don't have a sex joke for that).

"Dante come on, we need to go to class, then you need to explain what all that was." Ruby ordered, surprisingly authorative now. Dante nodded and stood up, motioning for the team to start walking. Team JNPR, without the J again, waited for Jaune to finish his talk with Professor Port.

"But! Classes and the explanation will happen in the next Chapter of, Slightly Unhinged!" Dante suddenly yelled, confusing everyone there.

 **In Purgatory...**

"Hello dear readers!" Dante greeted. "Since the author wants this chapter to be a thousands words or more and he's run out of material to write for now, he's decided to write me, the lovable Dante, to talk to you guys!"

Actually, change of plans Dante.

"Say what?"

Yeah the change was *starts whispering so you can't hear, or at least, the author won't write it so you don't know it*

"Ah! Well then, it seems that this entire conversation was literally just to increase the length of this chapter and make it so the story seems longer so you read it, because the author wants views and fans."

That's only partly true.

"Yeeeeaaaah, suuuuure."

Okay, mostly true. The other reason is because I want people to laugh at this ridiculous conversation between floating words and a crazy god.

"A fair reason, yes indeed it is good sir, fair it is, indeedy it is."

You doing that thing that Chris does when he plays the part of Stewie's soldier in the episode where the fortune teller is telling Peter that he founded Quahog?

"Yes I am, I thought it would boost the comedic factor, make you seem funnier than you are."

Fuck you. Anyway, this conversation is just dragging on and the readers obviously don't care anymore so let's end it with a bang.

 **BAM!**

"That's not bang, that's bam."

Sssssssh, they don't need to know that.

 **Also, I found a theme tune for Dante.**

 **I'm Gonna Show You Crazy (Nightcore Male Version) by Bebe Rexha. If anyone can find a better theme tune to fit Dante's personality, then please, tell me in a PM or a review.**

 **Here's the link for Dante's theme tune: watch?v=_SF4_5Kmwiw**


	6. Chapter 6: The Madman's Psyche

**Last time on Slightly Unhinged...**

"Oh god Dante! I can feel you in my stomach!" Blake moaned.

 **SPOILERS! SPOILERS! KILL THE TAPE!**

 **This time on Slightly Unhinged...**

Combat class.

Ruby's favourite class ever. She could let Crimson Rose do the talking! No need for social interaction.

Though, her thoughts consistently wondered to Dante, the cat faunas.

Aside from his absolutely long and hard weapon that she completely adored, Dante was something she couldn't place her finger on.

As in, he muttered some weird words like: "Your species." Ruby found it weird.

Jaune was a human, and Dante referred to him as though he was a different species worthy of destruction, but Dante hadn't ever expressed dislike for humans, aside from Cardin but that meanie had it coming. So did that mean that Dante wasn't human?

' _This hurts my head! Stupid Dante and his weird ways!'_ Ruby pouted, a headache forming.

"Miss Rose. Would you like to demonstrate?" Professor Goodwitch's voice broke Ruby out of her thoughts. Ruby blinked.

"Uh, demonstrate what?" Ruby tilted her head. Professor Goodwitch huffed through her nose.

"A demonstration of the need to examine an opponent through sparring." Professor Goodwitch huffed. Ruby perked up.

"Oh! Sure!" Ruby immediately speed-walked into the changing rooms, going to get her weapon.

Glynda, however, was spinning a 'random' survey to choose which opponent Ruby would face.

Obviously, Ozpin had rigged it to have Dante face Ruby. The headmaster was extremely curious about Dante, and although he may just be a madman, both Ozpin and Glynda had mixed feelings about him. On one hand, they could feel an immensely powerful evil able to crush any and all that opposed it, and on the other they could tell that he was a paragon of justice able to bring anything to justice without fail.

"And her opponent shall be... Dante." She announced. Dante got up from his seat and wandered over to his spot in the arena. As he walked past her, he whispered something.

"Rigged." Was all he said, before he turned and grinned at her, waiting for Ruby to finish up getting her stuff.

Ruby arrived a few seconds later, clad in her signature outfit and massive scythe.

"Are you both ready?" Goodwitch asked. Ruby nodded. Dante scratched his chin.

"Gimmie a sec." Dante requested. He snapped his fingers and his flesh warped rather grotesquely and loudly. Everyone looked away and looked back when the noise stopped.

All of them gaped.

Instead of Dante, they saw Roman Torchwick. He had his cane, hat, orange hair, everything.

"Huh." He even had Roman's voice! "Haven't done that in a while."

"Whoa." Ruby muttered, staring at Roman.

"Whoa indeed, Red." Roman stated, twirling his cane. "Wanna dance?"

"I kicked his butt once, I'll do it again." Ruby proclaimed, whipping out her scythe. Roman chuckled and twirled his cane.

"Then by all means, take the first hit." He stated, standing perfectly neutral with his cane over his shoulder.

Ruby narrowed her eyes and zipped forward with her semblance, swinging her scythe in a wide arc.

Roman simply smirked and did the splits, which left his hat in the air, which twirled comically. Her attack went between his head and the hat, which fell onto his head.

He swung his cane at her chin, which sent her flying into the air. As she tried to correct herself in the air, Roman fired a flare at her, which exploded on contact. She hit the ceiling and caused it to crack. She fell to the floor and landed square on her back, unmoving. Everyone in the room was shocked, except for team WBY, who glared at Dante.

"Oh for the love of me, WAKE UP!" Roman yelled as he snapped his fingers and a green glow surrounded Ruby's body. She groaned and sat up.

"Owwwww." She moaned, rubbing her head. Roman snapped his fingers and Dante reappeared, without the grotesque change this time.

"And you are supposed to be a silver-eyed warrior. I'd tell you, Remnant would be fucked without me here." Dante muttered. "Oh wait, I've fucked it before, literally and figuratively. How are Salem and the kids doing anyway?" Dante's words were too quiet for anyone to understand, but they thought he was just muttering about how easy Ruby was to beat.

Dante wandered over and helped Ruby to her feet.

"Well, by knockout, I suppose Dante wins." Glynda began. "Ruby, you should not be so head-strong to attack an opponent at face value, you have neither the strength nor the toughness of your sister." Glynda turned to Dante, and she took a minute to think of something to say to him. " Dante, don't be so impulsive to show an opponent your moves, showing off will not win you a fight."

"What if it's a fight of who can show off more?" Dante asked, sarcasm clearly evident in his tone. Glynda settled for glaring at him. All he did was chuckle.

 **Oobleck's class...**

Dante stared with a look of boredom at Doctor Oobleck. He did not design humans to be able to move so fast, but they were known for breaking the limit he set on them. Many times before they had broken their limits, not all of them beneficial for them.

The wars humanity had, no matter what dimension he entered, never ceased to amuse.

He watched Cardin throw a paper ball at the back of Jaune's head, the blonde youngster jutting up and making a surprised sound, causing Dr. Oobleck to call on him. He guessed and got it wrong, leading to the class laughing at him. Dante merely smiled and shook his head, even as team RWBY and NPR glared daggers at Cardin.

Conflict, even amongst the most pure, was ingrained within them. It was why he designed them that way, so they could best amuse him.


End file.
